Tuesday, September 27, 2011

I Say

I say
supporting the troops
is bringing them home

I say
the best way to help them
is to not put them in harms way

I say
no more death perpetuated by those
not willing to give their lives
for an idea
that they want others to

I say
raise your flags high in the air
you need it to cover
the lie you live

I say
it’s time for a change
(just like always)

I say
hold onto your guns tighter and tighter
you might lose that power
you think you have

I say
let’s let go of the bombs
the chemicals, the death

I say
the green is good
especially when compared to
a mushroom cloud

I say
the end is coming
if we don’t stop it

I say
the end is happening
because we are making it so

I say
we should no longer ignore it

They say
put your hand at your head and stand at attention

They say
do whatever I tell you to do

They say
follow orders, be a good citizen, be willing to give your life

They say
die for me
die for this idea
be willing to be part of something greater than yourself

I say
that all they want
is death

(9/27/2011 3:26 pm)

Don't Read This

We don’t need more jobs, we need less people.

Picture an Indian going into Wal-Mart.

I am old enough to realize I might be being naïve about it, but also in my mind too young enough to care.

I am happy to live in a town in which they can leave pumpkins outside overnight at the grocery store and not have to worry about it.

Our guns make us think we have control, but we are out of control in our use of them.

If you think the Earth is overcrowded, just imagine the afterlife.

Always serious is boring but always funny gets annoying.

Socrates is sitting there in deep thought. His wife, Xanthippe comes in. “What the hell are you doing?” she says. “Thinking.” “Thinking? I thought I told you take out the trash!” Socrates begrudgingly gets off his lazy ass and goes to take out the trash. As he does, his wife jaws, “And the grass needs cutting too!” It is another great day in the life of a philosopher.

Novel: Too many words, not enough meaning. See, I didn’t need a novel to say that.

Horoscope: The vague will continue to be vague. And, the ones who want it to be true will continue to read more into it than is actually there.

Rappers go from rapping about coming from nothing to rapping about all they have.

Jesus didn’t look like a carpenter. You ever notice that? He looked more like a guitarist. If a guy looking like Jesus came to put an addition on my house, I doubt I’d want to hire him. Jesus was not a good carpenter. He didn’t even have a square. Hell, the fucker was too busy with other shit that he never even got around to buying a level. I mean, any carpenter whose number one priority is the salvation of the entire human race for all time has too much on his plate to be making sure that 6 X 6 is properly squared so the angle iron can be bolted on.

If it came down to it, I might kill for orange juice if need be.

Thanks for reading, John.

People I Can Do Without

Even though I stole the entire "People I Can Do Without" thing from George Carlin, something in me thinks it is okay since these are all original and many of them were actually observed. Plus, I get too much fun out of writing them to stop simply because Carlin came up with the phrase. Anywhere, here are a few.

  • Women who drive big trucks who think it makes them cool.
  • People who pronounce “deux” in “Part Deux” instead of just saying “two.”
  • A porn star with a “Faith” tattoo.
  • Anyone who wears a headband and mouth guard to play pickup basketball.
  • Mothers who will only hang out with their daughter if she, “has the good weed this week.”
  • Any woman who moves to America for the sole reason of doing porn.
  • A married couple who met while filming a porn (especially if the only reason she was in America in the first place was because she moved here to film porn).
  • Men who bring a lot of things to the gym.
  • Anyone who refers to having people over their house as “entertaining guests.”
  • Any man over the age of 15 who wears color coordinated sports team apparel in public.
  • Anyone with a Christmas tree sitting in their front yard come the end of March.
  • Anyone with a smile on their face as they walk past a funeral.
  • Anyone who waits outside Goodwill for it to open at five of 8 in the morning.
  • Anyone who has three hookers in a matter of two days, spends over $400 and doesn’t get any sex out of it
  • Any man I can’t recognize outside the setting of a bar.
  • Anyone who delivers pizzas in a Ford F350.
  • Any male over the age of 8 who tucks a napkin into his shirt while eating spaghetti.
  • Twins who always dress alike.
  • 90 year olds riding motorcycles. Scratch that. Anyone who rides a motorcycle.
  • Anyone who smokes but can’t afford a haircut.
  • Pro athletes who wear jewelry while they play.
  • Any 30 year old riding a bicycle with training wheels.
  • Any garbage man who wears a suit and tie while on the job.
  • Anyone who produces rap beats but describes himself as a “music composer.”
  • Anyone who won’t take the toothpick out of his mouth while being interviewed for national television.
  • Anyone who decides to convert to Scientology after watching Battlefield Earth.
  • Anyone who doesn’t bother to brush their teeth before a first date.
  • Anyone who frequently hangs out by a trash can.
  • Any guy with a lot of hair on his chest but none on his head.
  • Anyone who attempts to pimp out a Ford Escort.
  • Any 50 year old man who still has his mom drop him off at work.
  • Anyone whose favorite wrestler of all time is Mark Henry.
  • Anyone too good enough to be called Robert.
  • Any teenager who owns every episode of Golden Girls on DVD.
  • Obese people who plan to have Burger King cater their funeral.
  • Anyone who goes to a funeral expecting to get some.
  • Any woman who uses a funeral as a way to show off some skin in a sexy outfit.
  • Anyone whose favorite movie is “Good Burger.”
  • People who talk about how great Frank Sinatra was.
  • People who say “skidaddle.”
  • Anyone so out of shape that they must take a deep breathe before every sentence they speak.
  • Any bald man whose car shines more than his head.
  • Anyone who isn’t a pedophile, but still looks like one.
  • People who listen to rap music with as much introspection as if they are reading a great piece of philosophical work.
  • Anyone who sits at home on a slow day trying to decipher the unsolved Zodiac killer letters.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Through Tears

Time stands so still
when you think of the one you love
and somehow lost

(8/12/2011 2:42 am)

A Stranger

I enjoy being a stranger somewhere, walking in totally new, fresh. I enjoy coming to a town, a place I have yet to be and acting as if it is how it is supposed to be, as if it belongs this way. I like that sort of freedom of no one knowing, and of not knowing myself. Of being totally new. I enjoy picturing that dirt road and walking towards the town in that way, coming from somewhere no one else truly knows, staying for a while, and walking off to somewhere else no one truly understands.

In a way, we all do this. We are all on our path. Our little road. No one knows exactly, truly where we are coming from, or where we will one day go. They just know that here and now you are here and now. That is all it can be. That is the part of life we have to learn to love, learn to appreciate. That which is right here and now.

As the stranger walks into the town with the knowledge of his past, of his life accumulated to that point, all the people in the town know is a stranger has just arrived, a stranger with a whole new life.

Time to stay a while. One day he will walk on again. He will yet again wander to somewhere and something new. Like all of us. That road is there. The path is ready. But always remember to take your own, wherever that might be.
One Of Those Things

I took a bike ride today with my dad, sister Liz and my niece Ella.

I think some things are so good
writing about them takes some of it away

Some times are so irreplaceable
to put them into words
is nearly an insult

The moment is better lived
and left alone-
to stand on the horizon of itself

(9/17/2011)