Monday, November 19, 2012


Click on the pics to see the whole thing


"The Land."


"Chopping station."


My wood pile, all cut, split, and stacked by hand.  I've been busy.


Pride.


A tree.

Photos by Lori Parrino

Update

I apologize there have been no recent updates, but I am currently living without the internet or a computer for now.  Still writing, but doing it all by hand in a notebook the old fashioned way.  I have been very busy and trying to fit everything into my schedule.  I am going to make an effort to find some time to update now and then.  Just wanted to let anyone reading know that I haven't stopped writing, just am trying to rework my schedule so that I can find time to post.  Thanks for reading.

Monday, October 22, 2012

On The Future


I have a vision.  It’s a little hazy because some of it is so far away in the future, but it’s becoming clear because I am focusing on it.

Boring John's Thoughts


People run through the moment.  They have no now.  They are trying to get somewhere, to the next thing.  They are on their way to work, so they aren’t where they are, mentally.  They are off trying to get there.  There is no now to them.  There is only where they are going and where they just were.  They forget the moment at hand is the only one we ever, always have.  They just keep trying to be in another moment instead of realizing the amazement of the one they are in.

“Spirituality” is probably the most overused word in English.  Oddly enough, “Spirit” isn’t used enough.

There is so little self-discipline left.

If I was the word “nonetheless” I would think I was so cool.  "Hey, 'none' I am triple your name."  How did that happen?  It is three words in one.  I don’t think its that fair to the other words.  None, the, and less must have confidence issues knowing that nonetheless exists.  They are sort of nonetheless’s bitch.  If you really think about it, nonetheless is an unnecessary word, nonetheless it exists.

I know two people.  They both come into pizza house.  They don’t like each other.  One is a guy who seems to have taken too many drugs in his younger years and also seems to be lonely but is always willing to talk to people.  He is a little nutty.  He works cutting lawns and plowing snow.  The other is this guy who comes from money and always has this sort of attitude, this entitled attitude about him.  He lives next to my mom and he has a perfect yard and house (perfect to most people).  I like the crazy guy better.  He’s been through more shit.  He’s still here, affected.  He’s a little messed up, but he survived.  He might not be for everybody, he might have a lot to say that not everyone agrees with, but I like him.  This other guy over here had it easy.  He doesn’t have that much interesting to share.  He bores me, his being okay with his commonness is angering to me.  I’ll take that weirdo talking about Jesus with a crazy look in his eye over that guy who cuts every inch of his lawn into the perfect height into the month of October any day.  I drive by and sort of snicker at him cutting his bushes to a perfect length.  That other guy there with a crazy look in his eye rambling on about life is far more interesting to me.

The problem with domestic violence is twofold:  Men who beat their woman and women who stay with men who beat them.

I saw a spare tire wheel cover on the back of a jeep that had an American flag and it said, “There’s Only One.”  Yeah, good fucking thing.

A possum is part of the rat family.  That means they can go over a rat’s house for Thanksgiving dinner.  None of that was true.

Looking for perfection, I ended up finding nothing.

Everything is fine, except us.  Nature will have it’s way, it will do its thing.  We might not be a part of that anymore.  Everything is fine.  Go outside in the open in the woods.  It is quiet.  Things are right.  Everything is fine.  Things are as they are supposed to be.  Then, go downtown, and see where the problem truly lies.  Yes, with us.  “The planet is fine, the people are fucked.”  I keep trying to write something and realize George Carlin already said it better than I ever could.

I bought land.  I don’t own the land.  Now it’s free.

I am outside.  I stop.  Look at gate.  Think about it.  Get a slight running start.  Jump over it.  Yup, still got it.

I never thought I’d get to the point where my favorite channel is Home & Garden, but I might be there.

Getting something back from what you put it.  It can’t be described.  A tear as you drive lets you know that giving in, being part of what you are meant to be always has ways of giving back.  I was outside in a mid October day, more than three hours, working with the land, the water, the wind, the trees.  Sky above, ground below.  I was part of something.  I had a connection that cannot be described.  It came out later.  I couldn’t hold back the emotion, the tears, knowing just how great it felt to truly be what you are meant to be, to truly be connected to what we have all come from.

Excess is the problem.  That is somehow tied in with greed.

Find a way to succeed.  Your own way.  There are always loopholes, always possibilities.

I don’t care about the money I spent on you - you wasted my time, and that is far more important to me.

Life would have been so lame had you not been there.

Lifting your shoulders or squinting your eyes while in the rain doesn’t do anything.  Everyone keeps doing it, though.  Actually, raising your shoulders only makes the rain hit you that much quicker.  Why does everyone seem to do these things?

We are bored, so we destroy.

No matter how far it is, home is never too far away.

Too many people abide by the rules.

What you can’t change, learn to like.  Or at least learn to accept.

I want to get away from people as a whole but be as close as possible to people I am close to.

There is a cliff ahead, and some of us see it, but as a society, we still have our foot on the gas.  I am trying to hit the brakes.

Kids these days.  Shit.  I just said it and I meant.

I have nothing to promote.

Friday, October 19, 2012

Life

I see happiness, sadness, tears of both sorts.  I see death, and love.  I see life and sadness.  I know what is to come, somewhat.  I can feel the emotion now, slightly as I sit here writing this.  I know there will be good, there will be bad, there will be joy and sorrow.  Elation and depression.  Friends and enemies.  There will be work and play.  There will be fun and boredom.  I know there will be tears of happiness, and tears of sadness.  There will be death of the ones I love, but also the birth of ones I will love just as much.  There is never a rubber band around how much love one can feel, it is infinite.  I know these things are to come in my life, I look forward to them, even the negative, even the bad, even the sadness, because that is how it is, that is what it is, that is how life works, and without it, life just wouldn’t be what it is.  I see these things in the future, and I look at them knowing there will be pain, but there will also be so much laughter.  There will be hope.  There will be faith.  There will be gratitude and thanksgiving.  But, there will also be selfishness, ego, and arguments.  I will just try to do my best.  I look forward to what life has to offer.  Love.  John.

Hope For The Heartbroken

She might have taken all of the love you gave her and ran
but if you have an endless amount
she hasn’t taken anything

(9/13/2012)
Intensity.  Love.  Passion.

Effort.  Determination.  Work.

Emotion.  Realness.  Discipline.  

Things


The duck face picture must have some sort of biological function that works for attracting male mates because although they look absolutely ridiculous, women keep doing it.

Church steeples scraping into heaven.

When I was a kid, I wanted to be able to see over the counter at Subway.  Then, I got old enough, and I saw.  It wasn’t as cool as I had thought it would be.  That is some sort of metaphor.  The awe, the mystery was so much better than actually finding out.

At a sandwich shop
A:  Is your roast beef rare?
B:  Oh yeah, this cow was a total weirdo.

You get a headache from drinking, which is poisoning yourself.  So, you take an aspirin, another poison, to feel better.  You poison yourself then poison yourself with another poison in order to feel better.  Hope you feel better.  :-)

…that’s just the loneliness talking.

A riot sums up humanity.  One after a sporting event sums up America.

When you get something that is autographed, they give you a certificate of authenticity so that you know it is legitimate.  What if that was faked?

I can’t only think of now, forever is always on my mind.

Diagnose; a word that shouldn’t exist.

It’s warfare everywhere.

I’ve never been to Panera Bread.  Thank you.

A reality that no one wants pointed out:  We all die alone.

Regarding Vermont:  Any state that is known more for the animals than the people that live there I am all for.

People seem to always be smiling in pictures.  It can’t always be real.

Who is to say anyone knows anything?  Who is to say there are truly experts in a scientific field, which will just be updated in the future anyway?  We always only know the most to our knowledge at this point, which isn’t that much.

When you are newborn, a young child, you see things as they are.  As you grow older, you start to seem them as you are.

Death isn’t forever.  It can’t be.  Life cuts into it.

They want the yearn for love more than to actually be loved.  Perhaps I do too.

The Pope:  Just another guy who takes a shit.

Regarding the sleep number bed:  When did sleeping on a huge cushion triple the size of your own body become so uncomfortable?

Think back, you are looking at the future right now.

Sex is for right now.  Love is forever.

I have a vision.  It’s a little hazy because some of it is so far away in the future, but it’s becoming clear because I am focusing on it.

I feel like, in many ways, I learned nothing of worth in school about what life as an adult is going to be.

If you are eating out at a restaurant and the apocalypse happens, you got a free meal out of it.

I bought land.  I don’t own the land.  Now it’s free.

I don’t want it easy.  I want it real.

Thanks for reading.
Leave shit alone!

Friday, October 5, 2012


Dear Jerry,

Hey there, Jerry, how’s it going?  I have this clothes wringer for 100 bucks if you want it.  Oh, you don’t wash your clothes by hand in your tub during the winter?  Well, what the hell is wrong with you?  Oh, you have a machine that does it for you.  More power to you, my friend, more power to you.  Go take a walk with a dog that isn’t yours.  That should be fun.  Try to one day get paid for it.  That is the type of thing you are meant to do.  Dog walker.  Yeah, that’s it.  Hey, I gotta go eat some crayons for lunch.  I’ll save the green ones for you if you want, I know you like them.  Until then, take this paper clip, you can use it for whatever you like, and don’t say I never do anything for you - remember I drank that puddle in front of your feet so that you didn’t have to step in it?

                                                                                  Sincerely, your old pal, Brad

Monday, September 17, 2012


Gently In The Distance

The sky is trying to teach us something
if we are willing to listen

The rivers are speaking to us
we are just too busy to hear it

The wind is whispering into our ear
we just must be open to such a thing

The land is our neighbor
with news of the day

The rain, the streams, the rivers, the ponds
all forms of communication with us

The bird overheard
flying freely in the sky
just look
and learn

The soft gentle voice of the breeze
peacefully attempting to teach us;
never forcing

Then, he starts his tractor.

The loudness of humanity
attempting to muffle what life is about
but gently in the distance
I hear the trees rustle

(9/16/2012 4:43 pm)

Saturday, September 15, 2012

With desire, possibility becomes.

Absolute Nonsense


Imagine a narcoleptic dating an insomniac.  I wonder how much they would sleep together.  Bahahahahahah, get it, sleep, ahahahahahah.

Without reason behind it, anything is insane.

How much smaller will Klondike bars get?  What would I do for one?  Hell, what did you do to them?

Have you looked around this planet?  Take a look.  Really look.  What a dump.  What a fucking dump we’ve turned a paradise into.  It is our fault.  This is what we have done.  What selfish, self-centered fuck ups we truly are.  It’s a fucking joke how sad this whole thing is and how little we care.  It’s an embarrassing, depressing, pathetic mess, and it’s all our fault.  What a shame.  What an absolute embarrassing mess we are for letting such a beautiful thing be turned so ugly by our egos.

If McDonalds closed, what would they do with all the old people?

Beer is associated with everything in America.  Why?  Think about it.  Football, beer.  Saturday night, beer.  Going out to eat, beer.  Hanging out by a campfire, beer.  Dancing, beer.  Going to a concert, beer.  Getting together with friends, beer.  How did they do this?  They have made everything connected to beer, even things that are totally opposite like going out into the woods and going out to a club.  How did they do that?

Never let society define you - instead, define it.

…there I was at the age of 27, Googling, “Lady Gaga’s ass.”

My fantasy football is it doesn’t exist.

Kids play with toy airplanes who grow into adults who fly real ones into buildings.  What happened to change something so drastically in such a short time?  That is a lot of corruption of innocence in a relatively short period of time.

She is just Sue Anthony to me.

The cities make the people cold, hard, disconnected and distant, just like the concrete that surrounds them.  The concrete is void of any true, real life - it stops it from growing.  How do people expect to be connected to each other or their surroundings while being surrounded by something that cuts off all connections?  The main thing surrounding them is concrete and pavement.  The main thing surrounding them is something that won’t let anything surround it.  It is death surrounding at all times instead of life flourishing.

Hiking is just walking where there are trees instead of annoying people.

Ninja dung!

As adults, we think all the music that kids listen to sucks.  We forget that even when we were kids most of it did.

You couldn’t take my love away.  There is an endless amount inside of me.  You take away part of an infinite love, and there is only infinity left.

In America, here we are…making heroes out of losers.

Make yourself a legend.  No one else will.

People I Can Do Without


  • Somebody who always smells like incense.
  • Old men who say areola, even if it is just a little bit.
  • Any woman out walking her newborn at ten at night.
  • Women who always play with their hair while they are out on a date.
  • Anyone who claims they, “identify better with the dead.”
  • People who talk while holding onto their glasses with their other hand.
  • People who refer to themselves as “Bubbly.”
  • Anyone attempting to bring back the Hitler mustache.
  • Any kid who says he want to “be as famous as Stalin.”
  • People who keep touching my face.
  • A homeless tea connoisseur.
  • Anyone who thinks of pizza as an appetizer.


Thanks for reading.

Friday, September 14, 2012

You basically learn that no one knows anything.

Monday, September 10, 2012


Release

There is no religion worth believing in.

No deity worth bowing your head to.

There is only an idea of gratitude, one of thankfulness to give thanks to something, anything for the life that you are lucky enough to live.

There is no group worth being a part of.

There are only the ideals of goodness, truth, love.

Truly, you know this.

There are no steps to heaven the masses shuffle up.

Life is individuality, and we must all take our own way to happiness, to what is right.

There is no one to follow.  There is no one to lead.

There is only yourself and what you know is right.

God is dead, as is the idea of a collective belief in it.

We must move forward with a different view of life.

In the darkest of spots one can see the most light.

The end is just a new beginning.

Let’s journey onward.

Freedom.

(9/10/2012 10:19 am)
Think.

Think about it.

Life is a thought.  What is yours about it?

Life is a thought.  What is yours about it?

Life is a thought.  What is yours about it?

Life is a thought.  What is yours about it?

Life is a thought.  What is yours about it?

Life is a thought.  What is yours about it?

Life is a thought.  What is yours about it?

Think about it.

Think.

Friday, September 7, 2012

Things That Popped Into My Head


Internet Explorer 9, a web browser, is describing itself as “Safer and sexier.”  Yes, that is right, “sexier.”  I am not making this up.

On anything:  It aint hard, man, you just gotta want to do it.

Birth - When I started, I didn’t have anything to begin with, so what has been lost?  Only what I thought I had. - Death

I’ve had what should have been enough, it wasn’t enough, so I’ve had enough.

There is always something to look forward to and something one doesn’t want to look forward to.  Wisdom is choosing the right one to think about.

The philosophy teacher was sleeping with one of his students while he was married…he didn’t really think that one over now did he?!  Bahahahha.

Some people squirt a pile of ketchup then dip their fries into it.  Some people squirt the ketchup onto their fries then eat them, getting ketchup all over their fingers.  I am going to start putting the ketchup on my fingers then picking the fries up, thus getting the ketchup on them from my fingers.

Do good in school, kids, but do better in sports, that is more important.  Ask the scholarships.  Ask the salaries of professional athletes.  Ask our backwards culture.

People say that you can’t win if you don’t play, sometimes referring to gambling.  That’s not true.  You win by keeping what you already have.

We’ve never been so connected as a society, but so disconnected because of it.  We are so connected through the internet, through TV, through radio, through phones, through satellite.  We can talk to people from across the globe.  But the thing is, we just aren’t connected.  We just have this trouble actually talking face to face, real world type of interaction.  We think we are so connected but in actuality, we are disconnected from the naturalness of human interaction.  We forget how to talk to and interact with people that we actually meet and see.  Go to the city and watch the people.  They don’t talk to each other, they don’t communicate, they don’t say hi, they just walk by, looking at their phones, listening to their music, they are in a rush toward nowhere.

I want to find that love is what I thought it was, not what I have found it to be.

One letter talk:  F’n A, I f’d a g, b. = I can’t believe it, but I had sex with a gangster, man.

We need words for gratitude because we just don’t know how to show it.  Same with love.

There is more to life than sex.  All the rest of it.

I was in a pond today, totally alone out there surrounded by water and woods, and as I swam on my back, I looked up to a totally blue sky and noticed a bird flying high overhead.  I realized that at that moment I was as free as that bird.  I started to pray in order give thanks for all that I have in my life.  (August 26, 2012 North Pond Savoy MA)

I would save a half bitten banana for tomorrow.

There is realness in the hills.  There is nothing fake about the trees.  There is truth in the woods.  There is no makeup there.  There is no fakeness.  There is nothing but what is, and it is very, very real.  There is truth residing in the mountains, and I want to live there.

Things that don’t make sense but are oddly true:  It is harder to clean your ears with Q-tips when looking in the mirror to help do so.

Nature is annoying when it’s not free.

How people say it:
White people - McDonalds.
Black people - MacDonalds.
Asian people - Wendy’s.
(I realize the last one makes no sense, but I like it)

August 23, 2012
“So James, tell me what life is about.” - Me (I am 27)
“Nothing.” - James (he is 5)

Strange

People are strange when you’re a stranger.
People are stranger when you’re not.

If you think that the elite aren’t trying to distract you from what is important, just look at Nicki Minaj.
There's a mist over forever, and it's called thought.

Monday, September 3, 2012

If the sky fell on me, I'd just hold it up.
Somewhere Deep

I was driving on a dark, moody night
and I realized that time is irrelevant to love
and no matter how many years pass
my love for you remains.

(July 2012)

Three Things



  • You can’t kill hate with hate.
  • When the car wreck of your life comes, will they be able to pull your soul from the wreckage?
  • Society always tells you to stand up for what you believe in, but as soon as you stand up for something most don’t particularly like or agree with, individuals hate you for it.

Friday, August 31, 2012

Never let the dream die.

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Reason

No reason to write
is as good as any
to do so

(8/23/2012 1:58 pm)

The Writing Is Getting A Bit Better


As you get older, the days themselves seem longer, but time overall looking back seems much shorter.

He wants to live off the grid in the woods, he must be out of his mind or on something.

I don’t know.  The nature of reality?  I don’t know.  Where life comes from, where it is going, why it happens, what exactly is going on?  I don’t know.  How the sun rises and sets, how the plants grow, why the wind blows, what the stars are doing up there.  I don’t know.  How life works, just what is time, is it supposed to be the way it is, why does the winter come?  I don’t know.  Why do we love what we love, what makes us who we are, do we belong where we are, are we doing what we are supposed to be doing?  I don’t know.  Do you?

Stop it.  No, I’m serious.  Just stop it.  You know what I’m talking about.  Think about it.  You know exactly what I’m talking about.  Just stop it.  Stop it, now.

Energy can be neither created nor destroyed.  Energy.  Energ.  Ener.  Ene.  En. E. There.  I just did both.

It’s not in the stars.  It’s all right here.

Everyone is selling something.  Mostly their soul.

Shit, man, stop saying shit, man, and man, stop saying man, shit!

Church bells so loud and distracting, we can’t hear god’s sounds of nature.

The only place you ever truly are is in your own mind.  Go here, go there, move to Tennessee, live in the middle of the woods, go out into the ocean and drift.  You are always in your own mind.

Piss on this.  Piss on that.  Spit on this.  Spit on that.  Rat a tat, that is that, fuck you, corn niblet fucker!

I haven’t smoked crack in 27 years!

I block out the sun with my hand.  Something so small holding off something so grand.  I block out the sun with my hand.  You can too.  Hold it up to the light, then look beyond.

There is something beyond the sun, but it is almost too bright to see.  Some of us will keep looking.

Our generation could be doing so much better.

It’s beautiful out, except for all the people.

Things are good.  I won’t complain otherwise.  I have my legs.  I didn’t get into a car accident.  Even if I lost them, even if I got into that crash, things would probably still be pretty fucking good from where I am looking.

We never lose our childhood search for knowledge, never be so old as to think you know enough to not wonder.

I choose wonder over an answer.

I got the monkey off my back, the one I put there, clawing at me because of my mistakes.  I got the monkey off my back, the one I somewhat invited to stay.  I got the monkey off my back, I did it by doing the right thing.

Mixed Martial Arts:  Yeah, because that guy getting punched in the face reminds me of something Da Vinci painted.

Raising money to save the Earth is like aborting babies to save the human race.

There is cell phone service at Hancock Shaker Village.

I was born to be this age.

It’s always more peaceful outside than it is in for some reason, especially at night.

I believe in God.  I have to.  My life is too good not to.

Be careful, you just might chase the love dragon to it’s tail of loneliness.

I saw this group of guys on their bicycles with their helmets on and their spandex outfits and I thought to myself, “These aren’t real bikers.  These are people that drive their bike somewhere with their car then ride.”

The one imperfection about perfection is that it is perfect.  The limits of perfection make it no fun.  There is no realness there when something is without flaw.  Nothing human about it.  The limits of perfection make it stale, never varied, without a true rhythm, machine-like.

True religion need not be true to anyone other than the believer.

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Dare

Is the risk worth the reward?

What if one is to never get the reward?

The risk is the reward itself
for daring enough to try.

(8/24/2012)

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Thoughts From An Old & Stupid Mind

You feel like you could almost die without something then you get it and you feel as though you could easily live without it.

I am a hunger satisfaction transfer professional, also known as a home cuisine distribution specialist and today I was wearing my mobile storage waistline unit.  When I was younger, I got laid off and I considered myself a willing laborer social casualty income beneficiary.

I don’t need an answer.  The wonder is more than enough.

Ghandi?  Oh yeah, I remember him.  I used to make fun of that guy in high school.

I was sitting there, and I started getting a loud hum/ringing in my ears and I realized that it was finally quiet enough to hear how loud it is.

I’m working on a story idea called The Boy Who Cried Shit.  This is going to be about a boy who keeps crying shit, but when people come to see, they find out that he hasn’t actually shit.  In the end, he actually does shit and cries shit, but no one actually believes him.  The twist here is that he has run out of toilet paper.

Jesus did crack.  (There, someone finally said it).

Someone once said, “Support me like a bridge, to jump between depression and elation.  Step across me like a savior over your despair.”

Fuck School.  Live Life.

Humbled by life.

My writing summed up:  Things no one has written, as far as I know, but I feel as though someone should have.

Actions speak louder than words.  It speaks loudly that the writer’s main action is writing words.

I was at a dating website and a huge condom advertisement popped up.  Think about that for a bit.

You’re last act is shitting yourself, so have some fun.

Beauty within the ugliness, within the nothingness.
Disaster somewhere sadly within relief.
It’s all there - somehow.

Loneliness transformed can easily become wisdom.

People are strange when you’re a stranger.  People are stranger when you know them.

So much is lost and it’s so sad.

Fuck rabbit shit nothingness okay white cat lick grass jumping off the roof forever Charles Manson cancer ahahahah funny shit aint it asshole?

In retrospect, being deep never got me anywhere - only into more shit.

They all want your money.

Life Coach.  What a sad, sad term.

Everyone is the same because everyone is different.

Gladly lame.

I saw a bumper sticker that said, "Nuttier Than Squirrel Turd," which was totally evident given the fact that they paid money for a bumper sticker that said so.

I need the opposite of whatever buying a Macbook would be.

I’m sure I live forever in some way even my own mind can’t comprehend totally, or even partially.

I don’t want to spend my entire life working to pay off debts that I set up for them to collect.

Uncle Tom was a hoot and a holler, I tell ya.  What a guy.  He was once arrested for fingering his navel in public.  He was at the food court of the local mall, and got himself hot and bothered over his Burger King fries.  Creepily rubbing a French fry near your navel in a crowded area is never much of a good idea.  He was quite the odd character.  Always wore a pink top hat, and was rarely seen without holding his cat Smooches in his arms.  He got himself in trouble with the law numerous times throughout his life attempting to bring the cat with him into stores.  He never learned of Petco’s wonderful policy.  Research wasn’t one of his strong points.  He once said that the only thing he had every “truly researched” in his life has been a piece of phlegm he coughed up in 1983.  He died by choking to death on a life saver and his body was found covered in cat litter, an act many think Smooches did as a burial.  Smooches could not be reached for comment.  His top hat will be missed.

If a deaf person goes to a silent movie, that shit is repetitive.

Liberty.  Justice.  Freedom.  Bullshit.

You ever hear someone say, “A tomato is actually a fruit.”  They say it like they are all cool.  It’s like, “Fuck you, no it’s not!  I don’t give a shit who says it’s a fruit, that thing is a vegetable.  Ask my childhood.”

When I hear about a 20 year old kid getting killed fighting in a war, I stop.  I will stare you all in the face and slowly ask, “Why is some 20 year old kid risking his life fighting people in some foreign country anyway?”  Then I will just stare, with this look, and you will feel it, as I do, because I start to cry when I realize what it means.  The haunting words are so simple, but so hard to take.  WHY IS SOME 20 YEAR OLD KID RISKING HIS LIFE FIGHTING IN SOME STUPID WAR?!  This is what I want to know.  I want some goddamn answers.

There’s a sad song playing in my mind.  There aren’t lyrics to write, only a feeling to feel - one letting me know that things should be different.  It’s a sad song in my mind.  A sad, sad song.

I think even a mind erodes with time.  I know that even the mind cannot remain as sharp as it once was with the power of life doing what it does.  I think that even a mind isn’t strong enough to stay as it once was in the face of the natural forces of life.  I know that sometimes smoothing over rough edges can be a good thing, I realize that one cannot always remain what they are at one point.

Remain na├»ve.  You will soon wish you still were.

Tell me something, say anything to me,  I am here to listen, I am ready to give thanks.  My life could be from this point on only me stopping and giving thanks for everything I have had up to this point and I know that still wouldn’t be enough.  It is so easy to forget just how much we have to be grateful for.  Thank you.  Thank you something.  Thank you anything.  I must give back even just slightly like this.  This is nowhere near enough, but I have to say thank you, I have to be full of thankfulness, I have to give back something, if only in the mind.  I am thankful for the food I eat, the family I have, the life I have overall.  Just how good I have it.  I want to thank something, anything, god, life itself, those around me.  I want to just praise something for the life I have been lucky enough to have been given.  For opportunity, for strength, for family, for friends, for shelter, for food, for time, for life, for everything, for the pain, for the love, for the heartache, for the truth, for the bad times, and the good, for all of it, I must once again stop and say thank you!

There is a heavy difference between being in a rush toward nowhere and slowly moving toward nothingness.

Don’t waste your time, you will quickly find there isn’t enough of it.
Don’t waste your life, you will soon realize it is too precious.
Don’t hold back, life doesn’t have enough time for that.

A fully booked prostitute is a loose woman on a tight schedule.

Thanks for reading.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Don’t you know you don’t ever tell a rebel not to do something?

What Lies Within The Cracks

Your flags - I don’t care.
Your symbols - I don’t care.
Your politics - I don’t care.
Your countries, rules, laws, beliefs - don’t care.
The way your society works.
The things we find important as the masses.
The groups, the leaders, the followers.  I don’t care.

The people.
The individuals.
Their lives.
The resources.
The land.
The nature.
Your love.
I do.

The sun shining.  That bird flying by.  The common man.  The grass growing.  I definitely do.

Your concrete jungles.  Your cars.  Your overpopulation, leading to people not caring for one another.  I want nothing to do with it.

Your ignorance.  Your religion.  Your god.  I don’t care.
Your life.  Your family.  Your friends.  Your soul.  I do.

Share it with me.

(Summer 2012)

The Overall Theme Is Life

The Living Paradox.

Life - one big question.  As a kid, you think someone has all the answers, probably the adults.  Then, you get older and realize that not even they have the answers.  They are just kids grown up.  They don’t know anything more than anybody else.  Now, you are an adult.  You think someone, something has the answers.  It might be god, it might be religion, it might be something, anything.  But, as you grow, you learn to realize that no, there are in fact no answers.  There are only more questions.  It is just one big question.  The more you ask, even when you get a slight answer, only reveals more questions.  I’m not saying it’s a bad thing.  It is mysterious.  There is something amazing about mysterious wonder.  I would rather that than know something that isn’t worth knowing.

You look tired, like a good new mom should look.

The advertisements don’t have to work.  You don’t have to give in to them.  You don’t have to buy that shit.  The ads don’t have to work.

Too many times they take a good thing and ram it down people’s throats or they take a good thing and take it in the wrong direction.  Very, very rarely is it allowed to evolve naturally and stay, at the core, what it is throughout.  That is magic when it does.

In order for human life to happen, a certain thing must happen.  A man and a woman must share sperm and egg, usually though sex, and then the child grows in the woman’s body and is born.  That is how it happens for every person that has ever lived.  That specific thing has to happen for all of us to be here.  Why doesn’t something like that have to happen for us to die?  We all just die in random ways.  Nothing specific has to happen to make it be.  We just have to be alive and that is the one process we go through in order for death to happen.  Why does life have to have this one specific event happen in order for it to happen, but death just happens randomly and differently for us all?  We come to be through sex, through sharing of sperm and egg - all of us, that is the only way that life can happen for humans.  But, death, it doesn’t have an precursor like that.  The only process that has to happen to make it be is life.

A sad realization:  We all end up dying alone.  We can never go with someone else, it is always our own journey - alone.

Wasted on life.  High on how it is.  Tripping on reality. Drunk on soberness.

When you are a kid, you don’t understand that you can go through women like you go through pairs of shoes.  You see older people with women in their lives, and then one woman is gone one day and another is there instead, sort of just replaced.  You don’t see what that means, you don’t quite get it.  You don’t understand how people are able to just go from one woman to the next like they are a pair of shoes.  It still doesn’t quite make sense.

Regarding circumcision:  It is absurd that I have to even say this, but please don’t get part of your child’s dick chopped off.

My attention to detail is really gReat.

Life is the ultimate question but who is asking it?

Life:  No answer is good enough.  No answer will ever suffice.  No answer will be good enough to fulfill how amazing the mystery is.  I don’t want any answers.  The mystery is too amazing to have an answer.  No answer could possibly be good enough to warrant how amazing life is.  Nothing could answer it all.  There cannot be one answer to have it all make sense - it would never be able to wrap it all up, it would never be able to fulfill all the questions that there are, all the mystery and amazement that there is as you go through life.

Give me that banana, I’ll eat it.  Yeah, that one.  I don’t give a shit.  Hand it over.  You don’t want it, right?  Well then, give me the damn thing.  I’ll eat it.  Give me that friggin banana, it looks delicious.  Don’t go wasting it.

You ever have to pee really bad, but you don’t have a chance to, then you forget that you had to pee?  You no longer have to go.  But, then a little but later, you remember that you had to pee, and all of a sudden you have to go really bad again?  What is that?  How does it work like that?

How could I jump on the bandwagon?  I’m too busy driving it.

A diamond not in the rough.

At the bar, you can see the sadness in their eyes even through the drunken laughter.  You see beyond the forced smile to something somewhat hidden.  You see through the glaze over their glossy eyes to their deeper reason for having to run away from reality.

To see beyond the forced smile…

We are all from the same root, growing toward something.  We are all looking for an answer, for an idea that will satisfy us.  This is religion, yearning, the search.  We branch off from the same root, finding our way, finding our individual answers.  But, we all start from the same place, looking for something, anything to satisfy that thing within us.  We all start there, and I think that in a way, no matter what you find as your answer, they are all part of the same larger answer.  Each one of us is a leaf looking for an answer which is the tree we are all a part of.  Each one is different for every person, but they all lead toward the same spot - finding peace within yourself and being able to live with how things are, happily.  We all have our answer, our way, our road, our trip, our religion, our belief, our thing that helps us - that satisfies some answer within us to the forever burning question of just what the hell life is all about.  Mine is the fact that no answer will ever be good enough, and I will continue to be in awe of how it is, and give thanks to something, anything for the life I have been lucky enough to live.

I love your areolas.

I have watched South Park for more than half of my life.

If god is love, then her cousin is laughter.

You will regret all the hate that you have in your heart, especially if you act on it.

Life summed up:  You just keep taking shits.

My only goal in wrestling is that when I die, someone feels it necessary to give me a 10 bell salute.

Currently, there is peanut butter near my penis.

I’ve never had so much trouble eating a graham cracker in my life.

Thanks for reading.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Two Things


In a society where a painting costs 80 million dollars, we must all look in the mirror and wonder who is truly insane.

I had to start questioning reality and wondering what the hell was going on when I noticed all the different types of Mountain Dew available in the year 2012.

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

So much has changed when so little has had to.

At 27

Kids sitting on a sidewalk watching time go by.

They aren’t old enough to know just how precious it is.

They enjoy, while I think.

Trying to hold on, instead of letting go.

Kids sitting on a curb waving to people driving by.

They know something we too soon forget.

(7/4/2012)

Monday, July 2, 2012

Irrelevant Title


If you throw up honey, you just vomited bee vomit.  That’s double vomit.  Give it back to the bee, maybe they’ll eat it now.  Actually, the fact that you just vomited up vomit might cancel out that it is vomit.  I’m not willing to find out, though.

Totally racist statements that are true:  Black people look younger.

Chasing the love dragon.

God doesn’t even hate people who claim that he hates fags.  I’m guessing on that, just like they are.  Maybe god does hate fags, I don’t know, I have no direct contact with him.

Good name of something:  Firehouse Circlejerk.

Give me something good men do.  (Elapsed time with silence)  Still nothing?  Didn’t think so.

Stale grey cities.  Dark black clouds overcoming.  Turning the ignition to my car once more, puttering disease out into the atmosphere, into the air, into the very breathe of my neighbor.  Sticking a pipe into the ground, pulling out oil.  Fill up that big metal box, moving to nowhere, banging into one another, causing death.  The smile subsides slightly, the frown of life upon my face with this knowledge.

How many of us can society piggy back before we must jump down and learn to walk on our own, at least somewhat?

We are missing so much trying to gain too much.

I don’t know the difference between debit and credit.

It’s what’s on the inside of the thought that counts.

Garlic Success

I wish my name was Meep Geese.  I think I’d be a much cooler person had it been.

A DVD is fifteen dollars, a bag of apples is four.  Shouldn’t it be the opposite?

What the hell are all these Americans complaining about?  Most of you have paid vacations.

Forever never comes, it is already always there.

This guy I know told me he was sick and his sinuses were affected.  He said, “I can’t smell shit.”  I said, “Wanna bet?”  Then I farted.

When I was young my mom heard me talking about soap so she put a swear word in my mouth.

My childish wonder has elapsed.

You know what’s at the end of life?  Death.  What the fuck are you running for?  Why the hell are you going through it as fast as possible?

Most overrated wrestlers of all time:
Ric Flair
Andre The Giant

There is so much hate inside a person’s heart it makes me cry to think about how little people care for one another.

Some sort of metaphor:  A cow sacrifices his head, squeezing it through a barbed wire fence in order to get to the taller grass to eat.

I’m Cookie Crisp the cereal with no milk in it.  That’s what I am.

Here is something you don’t hear about all that often:  Neck Herpes.  It has a ring to it.

There is nothing but now - even later becomes now.

At 7/11 there is a sign that says, “Shirts and Shoes Required.”  That means you have to be wearing at least two shirts in order to go into the store.

Inner peace seems a bit boring.  I would rather be always yearning for more.  Inner peace?  What good is that?  Gotta keep going on, have to keep pushing yourself for better things.  Inner peace, what an optimistic bore.  Inner peace is just an optimistic bore.

Cats don’t understand the idea of property lines.  I think we should be more like them.

I’m on one solid trip, and it’s called life.

I haven’t gone nighty night in far too many years.

Some sort of metaphor:  Fire can’t feel the heat of itself.

The ambassador of everything mentally ugly.

Go own the dance floor, have the attention of the entire room, captivate, amaze.  Walk off.  Head down, slowly.  Find your spot - alone.  Your awe will soon be forgotten.  People quickly forget how much you amaze them.

People say something is like “finding a needle in a haystack.”  What if you have a metal detector?  Magnet?

Imagine if someone gave the President scopolamine.


Fuck

I wish I had the power of a thousand gods
then I stop
and realize that I do
and I feel so miniscule to know
I just don’t use it

(June 25, 2012 1:23 pm)
It’s nice to have money; it’s better to have time.

I Dare You

Truly face freedom in the face-
you might rather be caged

Face freedom in the face
it might be too daunting to know that now, it’s all up to you

Face freedom in the face - I dare you

(6/21/2012)

Monday, June 18, 2012

FUCK DOLLAR GENERAL!

Things

Mind renaissance.

Could you be doing better?  Think about it.  Could you?  Why aren’t you?  Could you be doing better?  Are you taking the easy way out?  Are you not working as hard as you should be?  Could you be doing better?  Think about it.  Really think about it.  Could you be doing better?  Could you be trying harder, giving more effort?  Could you be giving more to whatever it is that you are doing?  Are you giving it all that you have?  Could you be doing better?  Then, what aren’t you?

The more you get the more you want.  True, but, the less you need the less you need.

Abomination, fulcrum, contrary & Archimedes.

Try to imagine Gandhi in a strip club.

Protest by the way you live your life.

I am starting to like people.  I am getting soft.  I actually like a lot of people.  What the hell is wrong with me?  This could be becoming some sort of mental condition.  I better be careful about this before it becomes something too serious.

Leave your soul behind.

Where is all the passion?  Where is all the love?  Where is all the hustle?  Where is all the work?  Where is all the emotion?  I don’t see nearly enough.

“Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.”  I read that and really liked it.  I wanted to share it.

Who went and decided that gold is worth so much?

Water should be so expensive.  So should food.

Summer is the free ride you earn by getting through the winter.

“Oh sure, a good boy goes to work on the day he comes home.”  That sounds like the opening line of a novel.

Fasting:  The hunger grows, but you overcome it.  When the hunger finally subsides, the appreciation has room to blossom.

Break the glass ceiling and raise the bar.

Canning:  One of the smartest human realizations.

Just what the world needs - another modular home.

We have no respect for life.  None.  Actually, the opposite.  Abortion.

I waved to a farmer distant in the field, and he waved back.

I came around the corner in my car and there was a deer and her baby.  They went scurrying in different directions; scared.  I then realized what a piece of shit I am.

Hollywood gossip magazines:  Proof that women are empowered in our society.

I judge people’s mental health by the outfits they wear during the summer.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Become your soul.

Sunday, June 10, 2012

People quickly forget how much you amaze them.

Saturday, June 9, 2012


Throwing Away A Bag Of McDonalds

She smells of passion
and looks of love
We have interactions with our eyes
that others don’t see
Is this a sign
of what could be?

She walks in the room
and throws away a bag of McDonalds
as she swings back
her blue top, with its fringes
sways with her movement
and I smell her perfume
and I think of writing this poem
and sharing more eye-mind moments

As she turns quickly back into the other room
she scurries innocently
like an embarrassed young girl
she once was

She swings that corner
and doesn’t think quite like this

She goes back to doing her thing.

I wish she thought of me
like I thought of her.

(Monday May 10, 2010 6:51 pm)
Advice

It times of challenge
we must do what it is right

It is life’s way of making us stronger

Never give in.
Never waiver.
Never falter.
Never change.
Always do what you know is right.

When negativity comes
overcome it
don’t let it overtake you-
be better than it

When life brings sorrow, sadness, pain, hurt, anger
come back softly
with compassion and love-
knowing that you can do better than what has been done to you

In times of challenge
get through it by doing what is right
never falter
never change your course
never let life turn you negatively to something you know you are not

When hurt comes
stay strong
When pain comes
stay strong-
overcome it
and be a better person because of it,
life has a way of rewarding such a thing

Do what you know is right
even in the eye of all the wrong that has been done to you

It is simple.  Doing it can sometimes be a challenge, but always do what you know is right, never falter, never change, never give in, be yourself, be true, be real, sometimes, if not just enough, things have a way of working themselves out.

Be strong.
Stay strong.
It will only strengthen you more.
It will only make you a better person.

Do what you know is right.

Don’t take the easy way out.
Don’t do yourself such an injustice.
Be stronger than that.
Do what you know is right.

(6/7/2012 3:48 pm)
Blessed.

Recent


The slave of society serves far too many masters.  Even the masters themselves are slaves to yet another master.  What is the hierarchy?  All we know is that money is at the top.

I’d jump off a bridge to save a pebble.

There is no void in my heart.  I filled it up with thankfulness.

“Satisfaction is the death of desire.”  I heard that one and it really hit me.  I just wanted to share it.

Freedom, yes.  Freedom.  YES!  To be able to let go.  To be able to be unchained.  Freedom.  There might be nothing better.  Freedom.  Freedom yes.  Freedom now.  Freedom.  Rejoice.  Thank you.

Where am I meant to be?
Wherever you are.

Things I like to see:  A kid walking in the rain who doesn’t care.

Go look in my fridge if you don’t think I got it good.

You see how fast a kid grows in five years and how little you do.

I’m trying to reduce myself to ant watching.

What is everyone laughing at?  I don’t know, but I’m going to laugh too - it’s fun, it feels really good.  Let’s all just start laughing at nothing, and that laughter will catch on and we can laugh together.

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Thankfulness

I am thankful.  I am full of thanks.  I kneel down in thanks for all that I have.  I cry in the shower, the pull of emotion letting go, a happiness that I must give back, tears that must come to show my appreciation.  I cry so hard I have to kneel down while doing so.  I can’t help it, it just comes out that hard.  I kneel down in the shower crying tears of joy, tears of thankfulness over all that I have; over how lucky, how blessed I truly am.  I have to thank something.  I have to thank anything.  I must do it.  I have to give back in such a little way.  Thank you family.  Thank you friends.  Thank you loved ones.  Thank you life.  I am truly blessed and stop enough to see just how good I have it.  Thank you.  These are not just words are on a sheet, this is truth.  I am so thankful for all that I have.  I am so lucky to have it so good and I must be thankful for it.  Thank you.  I am so thankful for my great family, my great friends, my community, the land around here, the sun, the stars, the wind, life itself, all the food I have, my job, my coworkers, my cats, I thank whatever it is for the ability to be able to stop and reflect and be thankful like this.  As I said, I could never possibly be thankful enough to be as thankful as I need to be.  I could live the rest of my life bowing down humbly thanking life and it still wouldn’t be enough.  But, I must do this more often.  I must stop like this and be thankful.  I have it so good.  I have an abundance of food, shelter; a roof over my head that is more than enough for me and anyone else who wants to visit.  I have it all that anyone could ask for.  Thank you.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012


Emotion.  Passion.  Effort.  Love.  Hustle.

I could never possibly be as thankful as I need to be.

Friday, June 1, 2012

YES! YES! YES!

It sounds fun to be a beach boy, but I’d rather be a mountain man.

My clothes dryer is never broken.  The wind will never stop.

Cars ruined it.

Less is more, more or less.

If there was a black family cast for that show, it could have been called Full Hizouse.  Either that, or a really lame white family attempting to be cool.  Or just a show about Snoop Dogg.

Funeral:  Why would you waste money on me?  I’m dead.  Buy yourself some food.  Let’s get real here.

History might just be a lie someone told.

When I die, just remember me eating an apple.

If people could just eat grass to survive, I wouldn’t have a job.

Some sort of metaphor:  Every cloud is a wave in a different form.

Life is a round trip.

We don’t see the contradiction of a Massachusetts Environmental Police truck driving down the road.

Pretty soon humans will be using gloves to take a shower.  “Hey, put your gloves on before washing your body, you are going to get yourself sick!”  “How disgusting to use your dirty hands to clean your body off!”  Can’t you see this happening?

When someone voluntarily decides to no longer live with money, I wonder how they plan to cut their fingernails.

If words are weapons, I might be a killer.
If time is money, I might be rich.
If life is too short, I hope I am enjoying it too much to notice.

Who the hell went and told Pitbull that he is talented?

You wipe the tears away, but the memory is still there.

Text your mom about poop.  I freakin dare ya.

I fondly remember you coming around, old chap.  Whatever happened to that?  I haven’t seen you in so long.  I haven’t felt you in what feels like forever.  I could use a hug.  But then again, you did try to bust my kneecaps with that bat when I wasn’t looking.  What was up with that?!  You still love me though, I believe that.  Perhaps you never did at all.  Either way, I put my hair in piggy tails for you and looked in the mirror blowing a smooch to you even though you live 600 miles away.  Take that.

All money is dirty.  All of it.

Gandhi rode first class.

The personal cost is the price you are willing to pay when you know what you are doing is right.

My cat Randy Marsh likes organic ketchup.

You can rhyme some words, but can you have them make sense in that order or do all your rhymes border on chaos and disorder?

Reality is a pole bent in water.  We see the bend, but not what is really there.  Our own life is the water distorting the pole so that it looks like it bends once it hits the water.  Do we ever get to see what the pole actually looks like, how it actually is, where it actually is without looking like it’s bent in the water?  I don’t know.  I don’t think anyone does really. 

Relax, the Pope is right about everything.

I might get a Scarlet Letter for saying this, but Huckleberry Finn can blow my Moby Dick.

Thanks for reading, John.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Pavilion

Pavilion.  That’s a good word.  Say it a few times.  Pavilion.  There you go.  That was fun, wasn’t it?  Try it again.  Pavilion.  Ah, yes.  What a great word.

Book Titles



  • Cheese Doodles As An Aphrodisiac
  • People Who Are Way Too Serious - Especially At A Funeral
  • Learning To Cope Through Laughter
  • An Oven Mitt, A Television, A 1998 Ford Escort - Your Night Is Planned
  • Shut Up Everyone
  • Will You Please Excuse Me, I Have To Take A Dump
  • I Know A Lot About Poop
  • People Who Don’t Care And Plenty Of Good Reasons Not To
  • Sin City Religious Organizations - A Guide
  • Hiking Through The Ghetto
  • Lollypops For Adults
  • You Suck And Deep Down You Know It
  • Fung Shui For Porn Stars
  • Organic Food For Your Dogs (Even Though They Lick Their Own Private Parts)
  • Gandhi Is Dead, And As A Matter Of Fact, So Is Hitler
  • N Word Christmas Tree
  • Okay, I’m Bored
  • Just What The Hell Is Happiness?
  • T-Rex Spaceship
  • My Life Coach Said I Suck, But His Job Is Being A Life Coach
  • You Already Know Most Of This
  • Some Random Idiots View On Things He Thinks Are Deep - A Philosophy Book
  • Ever Tried Cleaning Your Fingernails With A Blow Torch?  Here Is How
  • The Title Of This Book Is Way Too Long For Its Own Good And Really Doesn’t Tell You What The Book Is About But We Don’t Care, Buy It Anyway You Idiot
  • Go Ahead, Bitch Slap The Dalai Lama
  • Cryptic Tales Of Those Who Never Quite Overcame Mount Everest
  • What Is That Smell?  I Hope It’s Not You:  A Guide To Living In The City
  • Thomas Crapper’s First Bowel Movement, A Pop Up Book
  • Do Some Old People Pee Their Pants And Make A Mess?  Depends.  This In No Way Sounds Like A Book Title, But I Like The Joke
  • Cases Throughout History In Which Respecting Authority Was A Good Idea with sections by Idi Amin, Caligula, Hitler, Stalin, and Pol Pot.
  • I Said No You Little Brat - How To Keep Your Kid In Line So You Can Do What You Like Doing (Which Obviously Is Not Parenting)
  • Other Ideas For Homeless People
  • Don’t Look Up, The Sun, Stars, And Sky Aren’t Mesmerizing - Watch Your Television Instead
  • Wearing Spurs In Downtown Traffic
  • Hooker Love
  • Ultimate Warrior’s Guide To Doing Promos
  • Have Fun, But Don’t Catch A Disease
  • People Who Have Beat Up Their Father
  • Society Is Perfect And Nothing Is Wrong; How To Lie To Yourself
  • Call Your Dog "Stupid."
  • How To Find Out If Your Cat Is Secretly A Ninja (Without Injuring Him)

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Dance with everything.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Grass

Pt. I

You ever see those little pieces of grass that break through blacktop and grow?  My dad has them in his driveway.  I feel like that.  I feel like a little piece of grass breaking through some concrete.  I was born into the pavement.  That is what society is now.  I am an individual, however.  I am one piece of grass pushing through a bunch of pavement that is society.  You can see me making cracks.  “Be the change you want to see.”  By doing so, I make cracks in the pavement - other little chances for other pieces of grass to be able to breathe, to be able to live, to be able to get some sun, to be able to get out and do their own thing.  I want to totally burst out of the pavement and be a patch of grass.  I want that for myself, I want that for others, I want that for the planet, I want that for life.

Pt. II

First you have to live long enough to find out what you are about.  Then, you have to be open enough to go with that.  Then, you have to change your ways to live according to that philosophy.  You must rip up the concrete first, and then the next year plant the grass.  You can’t do it all at once.  You first must see the error in the concrete.  As a kid, you play on the concrete, you don’t know better.  You get older, and as an adult, you start to see what it represents.  You have to truly let yourself learn what it means.  Then, once in the mind you know what it is you are about, you can start moving toward that in your life, in your physical being.  You know there should be grass there.  But there isn’t.  There is concrete there.  You have to start to tear up the concrete.  You have to let the earth take back over, you have to give it a jump start (it would anyway, just not in your lifetime - nature moves slower than we do in our minds nowadays).  Once you have cleared the concrete, you can finally let the grass grow.  Then, it comes time to plant some seeds.  To let some more life in.  YES!

Monday, May 14, 2012

It doesn't take forever to get to immortality.

I've got money in the bank but adventure on my mind.

Sunday, May 13, 2012


A Different Tune

Caught in the goal
to be what it is
that we think we are meant to be
never able to see
just what we are doing
just what is possible otherwise

Caught in some goal of society, some goal of moving toward something.

Blinded by our own lives.
Blinded by the way it is.
Blind to how it could be.
Never truly knowing how it could be - should be.

Punching in again-
a piece of a puzzle we never stop to see that is not worth putting together.

A small part of a greater whole just not worthy of it,
but we just move on
swaying with it, going with it.

This is how it is.
This is what we are born into.
This is what takes drastic steps to stop.

We give in.
We let it continue on.
We are all on that road
towards annihilation
without wanting to realize it.

The children are the students
who learn from the masters we think are so-
nothing but fools ignorant to the fact of what they are doing.

Teaching, learning
going with the lessons passed down
while forgetting what life truly is,
what life is truly about.

We must dance like this.
We must live like this.
We must give in, in a way, like this.
It is so much effort to do otherwise.

Grab the hand of the next
we are all bobbing our head to how it is-
never truly thinking about just how unnecessary
just how futile
just how insane
this dance truly is.

We know nothing else.
We have lived it.

But there are other ways to dance.
There are individuals who dance to the tune of their own music.
They hear something else, they know a different tune.
They bob with that instead - away from the beat of the masses.

They flow with something different.
They are fluid with something most can’t see, most can’t hear, most can’t feel.
They know something few want to realize.

And they keep dancing their own way
all the while
the insane look on
thinking these people are so.

They keep going with the tune of their heart.
To the beat of their own drum.
To what they know is right.

We just can’t hear it as a society-
our ears are shut to anything different.
Our minds are closed off to anything that doesn’t equal the dollar.
Our fears of a different life hold us back from just how much better it can be.

We have it too easy.
We have it too good.
Things are too complacent.
We make it too complex.
We forget.

We forget the simple things
are what is important.

The most meaningful
is the look on someone’s face
that you love.

We are too caught up
driving down the road that has been paved for us
and we have no control of the wheel.

Bob your head, bounce in tune with it
never stop to look
never stop to stand back and see this group
dancing to the insane song
insanely dancing to the insane life

We are here in the corner
watching it all
just recognizing
how crazy it is
but one cannot see it
when so caught up
in the music
of our society.

(5/9/2012 3:17 pm)

Absolute, Undeniable, Utter Nonsense

Here’s the thing about philosophy - it’s just some idiot’s opinion.

People say, “No shit Sherlock.”  But few realize that it is because he was constipated.

Sometimes I think I know too much.  At least for myself.

As humans, we have to waste our time away mowing the lawn.  We spend precious time doing this.  We go to work so that we can make money so we can go to the store to buy a lawn mower, then we go to the gas station to buy gas.  Then, we waste precious time cutting the grass to make it short so it looks good around the place we live - for no real apparent reason other than to fit in to the houses next to us.  What the hell is wrong with us?

Why is there a “p” in “receipt”?

Societies leash only lets you run so far.

So many different lifestyles but so few who live.

Jalapeno popper penis.

One time I was just randomly picking in my ass and I came across a pine needle - and it wasn’t even Christmas time.  To this day I have no clue how it got there or where it came from.

As a species, we are bored.  Look at all the things we do to cover the time that we would otherwise be bored.  We have it too easy.  All of life’s necessities are taken care of for us.  As a species we are bored, we have it too easy.

Time; life’s natural hair gel.

Fuck you.  Yes, you!  Fuck you, mother fucker!  Fuck it all.  Fuck you mostly.  Fuck fuck.  Fuck this sentence and what the fuck I am writing.  Fuck you once again.  Fuck me.  Fuck just for the hell of saying it.  F.  U.  C.  K.  Yes, that spells “fuck,” as in “fuck you.”  Thank you for listening, mother fucking fucker fuck.

When push comes to shove and so called “writer’s block” sets in, you can always write about poop.

Imagine living in the wild hungry as fuck roaming around and finding a watermelon.  Think about that next time you are eating one.

On talking to someone in their teens at the age of 27:  I might sound like an old faggot at this point, which I probably am, but it’s okay.  It’s going to eventually happen to you too.

Remember when Lindsay Lohan was hot?  That was cool.

Hey society, listen up, I have something to say.  I’ll whisper it into your ear if you lean over this way.

James is my bitch.  He is an asshole.

Jesus wasn’t Christian, he was Jewish.  How does that even happen?  The man the religion is named after practiced a different religion.

Peanut butter dildo.

Go ahead, throw your boogers outside.

Ethil Merman’s nutsack

(looking at Mount Greylock, thinking) I always look up.  Then I start to cry.

The mountains within ourselves are what we must overcome.  Finding out what they are can be the hardest part.  We stumble and fall so many times over the rocks that are part of the mountain we don’t even realize we are climbing.  We get to the top without realizing it, then when we get back down, we see what it is we have to overcome.  This time we must walk back up the mountain, making sure not to trip and fall.

A life of excess, we forget what it means to be a real success.  We strive for a life not worthy of being proud of, we attempt to be successful at all the wrong things, we have our goals set in ways that really get nothing done, other than fulfilling some need for something within ourselves.

The amount I love individual humans is equal to the amount I hate them as a whole.

I thought of you and wanted to send a random text to say “hi.”  I wrote the message and when I went to send it, I realized your name and number is no longer in my phone.  When I got my new phone, I knew we didn’t talk enough to warrant even carrying your number over.  It was sad when I looked under my contacts and couldn’t find you in there - realizing my reason for doing so, realizing why I felt it no longer necessary to keep your number with me.  A random “hi” that never made it, another person that moved on from me, another person I was somewhat forced to move on from.

Somewhere, there is a blood stained shadow waiting to be washed away by something beautiful.  Somewhere, there is a man worthy of love with all the right things toiling by, sort of wasting his time away.  Somewhere, there is someone who never gets to meet that person.  Somewhere, there is someone alone who shouldn’t necessarily be.

A few haikus

Don’t let them fool you
No one knows what’s going on
They just think they do.

It is so weird to
sit here and count syllables
language is insane

What happens if you
attempt to write a haiku
then run out of words

I wanted to write
a really unique haiku
but ran out of syll

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

bulimic writers
involuntarily puke
here is some vomit

my cat is right here
(well technically not right here)
sitting next to me

the people downstairs
are making a lot of noise
must be a party

Thursday, May 10, 2012

When one born into an insane society becomes sane, society sees it as insane.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Thoughts, poetry, jokes, bullshit, nonsense.


Make good memories.  You will spend a lot of your time thinking about them as you grow older.

If all our writing was upside down, the only thing that would change is that it could take longer to read and write it.  We would still be able to do both, it would just take longer.  It is odd to think that if all our words and sentences and paragraphs were put upside down instead, we would still be able to read it, it would just take longer.  Find some upside down words and read them.  You still can, it just takes some more concentration.

Religion is a reflection of culture.

“Yes, I would mind if you beat the crap out of my aunt.”

I just don’t fit into a society where circumcision is the norm.  And honestly, nor do I want to.

The words distract us from the love.  Too many words, not enough love.  It all distracts us from what really needs to be there.  Too many words.  Not enough love.

They make you pay to get into a zoo, but it is free to walk out into the world.

Regarding pastrami:  No meat should be purple.

You say you have a big dick, but you’re lying, it’s a phallucy.

I love when someone says, “Only God can judge me,” because it’s like, nope, anyone can.

Cataclysmic Destiny.

Let’s clone George Michael.  Nah, never mind, let’s not.

oxymoron:  Goodwill corporate headquarters.

Circumcision exists.  So does abortion.  I’m just sayin’.

You know what’s great about being an adult?  You get to live however you want to.


On Living Simply

I’m sure I will miss some things
but then again
I might find some things
that I would have been missing otherwise
had I known they were there.

(5/9/2012 3:30 pm)

Thanks for reading.

How close are you willing to get to someone?
How much are you willing to tell - willing to give, willing to love?
How close are you willing to get to someone?
How far away will you remain, at what distance is too far apart?
How close are you willing to get to someone?
How much are you willing to let go?
How much are you willing to not know?
How little is too little to know someone?
How close are you willing to get to another?
Are you willing to know nearly everything?
Are you ready for something like that?
How distant can you remain and still feel connected to something?
How close are you willing to get to someone?
Would you give it all to know them?
How many strangers can you know without needing to know something more?
How close are you willing to get to someone?
How much time has gone by, somewhat wasted, without sharing yourself with someone?
How close are you willing to get to someone?
How much of yourself are you willing to share, willing to let someone know?
For how long can you remain away?
For how much time can you let go by without at least attempting to understand?
Just how close can you get to someone, just how much of them can you know, just how well can you know them?
How willing are you to get close to someone?
How close are you willing to get?

(5/9/2012)

Standing At A Distance, Watching

We’re all caught up in the music of society
too caught up with blindly following the next
to how it is
to ever see
just how insane
the dance truly is

(5/9/2012 3:26 pm)

The Very Core Of Everything

I looked at the small green tomato that was starting to come into life in my planting pot my mom got me for my birthday.  I realized what we are doing as a people.  We are wiping away life all around us.  We put roads where there should be grass.  We kill the life growing all around us to put concrete so we can drive somewhere.  We are poisoning the air with our gas fumes so we can drive to nowhere.  We have taken the one thing this planet has - life, and we are so selfish, we are taking it all away.  We are taking the only thing any of us has - life, and selfishly wasting it all because we want our lives to be easier.  We are wiping away the food, we are poisoning the water, we are polluting the air.  The food we need to eat, the water we need to drink, and the air we need to breathe.  All being ruined by us.  And, this isn’t just some small thing.  This is the very essence, the very core of EVERYTHING!  No one would be here without these things.  Not one of us.  This planet thrives because it is able to live, because life is abundant on it.  And, we are so caught up on getting somewhere and doing something that we have squandered the very life on the planet.  It is a near miracle this planet was able to give life in the way that it does, and we are slowly taking it all away because we are too caught up on something else.  In what is most likely an endless universe, we are one small planet lucky enough to be able to produce all forms of life - and look at what we are doing with it, look at how we are treating it, look at how we are taking it all for granted.  From history until now, from forever until it ends, we can blame ourselves for wanting things easier than they need to be.  We can blame ourselves for wanting our machines to make things easier so we don’t have to work as hard.  I just think of all the life on Earth, human, animals, plants, trees, the wind, the water, and how it all comes together and all sort of balances on each other, and I look at us toppling it all down for some dream that isn’t worth realizing.

(5/7/2012)

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Hug the individuals, and you have loved humanity.

SCRABBLE
U
C
K
STOP
       L
       A
       Y
        IT
       N
       G

Friday, May 4, 2012

Hi, my name is Jim.  I used to scratch horses for a living, but now I repair cars.  Things change.  So do people.  Who knows why.  The wind is amazing.  Think about it.  It’s sort of like the water.  Gay people are interesting.  Nice grey hair, comb that shit you dildo.  Well, we can’t be a couple, sorry, I am not into Amish men who wear pink dresses.  Anyway, have a good’n and keep safe out there on that wild trail.  Eat some raisins and never step on the yellow stained stairs - someone peed on them.
It’s Worth It

On a cobweb - life’s.

Sort of trapped in a way
to how it is.

Sort of stuck in what we are born into.

A spider web - societies.

Pulling us all into its grip,
so little way out,
such a struggle to get free-
but isn’t any effort worth freedom
in the end?

(5/1/2012)

Thank You

Thank you something.  Thank you anything.  Thank you life.  Thank you those around me.  Thank you loved ones.  Thank you family.  Thank you friends.  Thank you sun.  Thank you God.  Thank you water.  Thank you everything.  Thank you whatever.  Thank you hope.  Thank you belief.  Thank you.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012


To kids:
Don’t watch these people, man.
Don’t listen to them.
They don’t know what’s going on.
Don’t live how they do.
Do what you do.
Don’t let them be an example.
They have no clue.
The truth is somewhere.
Don’t let them influence you.
Don’t let their way of living soak in and make you think it is remotely sane just because you live in it.
Don’t dream of college and moving away from all that’s important.
Don’t let the ideas of the masses be what you are about.
You are an individual with your own thoughts - let them out.
Don’t go with how it is simply because that is how it is.
Question it.
Rebel forever.
Rebel your entire life.
There is a lifetimes worth of things to rebel against.
Don’t look up to adults.
They don’t know what is going on.
Most of them are just running through the motions, going with how things are simply because they were born into it.  It doesn’t make it the right way.
Live your own way.
Live your own life.
Don’t let all of this, our society, our ideals, our goals, our dreams be yours.
Don’t try to “make it.”
Don’t attempt to “make something of yourself.”
Don’t attempt to “be somebody.”
You already are.
You don’t have to make something of yourself, you just have to live the life that you want to.
Learn to be happy where you are instead of attempting to find that somewhere else in the future.
Learn to appreciate what it is here and now.
Don’t try to “get somewhere.”  Instead, try to truly be where you already are.
There are other ways of thinking.
There are different ways of life.
Whatever it may be in your mind, go with it.
Don’t let societal standards hold it back.
Don’t let the people around you make you believe it can’t be done.
Live your life.
No one knows what is going on.
Even the adults.
Don’t even think they remotely do.
Don’t let them fool you into thinking they have a grip on things.
Find a hero, and find them as someone close to you.
When they tell you something and you don’t agree, no matter how much older they are, tell them so.
Question them.
Question their actions, their thoughts, their beliefs.
Make them explain it to you.
Make them have it make sense.
Respect their opinion, their way of life, but realize you don’t necessarily have to agree.
People differ.
You can to.
Listen to your heart.
Listen to your loved ones.
Listen to yourself.
Listen to what you know is right.
Never let them tell you otherwise.

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Checklist



  • Pizza delivery guy.  Check.
  • Dog walker.  Check.
  • 30 day sleep study participant.  Check.
  • Radio talk show host.  Check.
  • Philosopher.  Check.
  • Basketball player.  Check.
  • Writer.  Check.
  • Stand up comedian.  Check.
  • Pro wrestler.  Check.
  • Free
  • Nothing

Working at a restaurant:  “Hey!  Put on gloves.  I don’t want you to use your bare hands to touch the dead body that I am going to eat!”

Keep It Mormon!


Strip it all away.  What remains is what mattered all along.

Philosophy is the woods, it is more or less where you will find it.  Philosophy is loneliness and that is where it makes its presence known.  Philosophy is introspection, philosophy is the universe within thinking about the one on the outside.  Philosophy is the darkness in the forest as the sun fades away.  That is where it will be found.  It is not some happy trip to the beach.  Philosophy is as close to nothingness as we can get.  Philosophy is at the core of thought, which is where it all begins.  Philosophy isn’t something many people understand, or even want to try to.  Philosophy is life, and much in the same, it is something we will never totally know, never totally comprehend, never totally come to understand, but the joy in it is going with the love of it.  Philosophy is chasing its tail towards nowhere, much like life, but the joy is the act of living it, going with it, delving into it.  Philosophy is what connects us to the past and what will bridge the gap towards the future - it is the link from the thought of ages gone by to the thought of today.  It is the minds of years passed somehow becoming part of the minds of today, which will again be passed on to the minds of the future.  It is a connection of thought bringing humanity together in a way, connecting us to where we started.

How come a woman never decides to live in a cabin alone in the woods?

Call up a pizza place and request that instead of having the pizza cut into triangles or even squares, you would like your slices cut into icosagons.

Our particle board minds collapse under slight pressure, they just aren’t made like they used to be.  Our particle board minds cannot uphold nearly anything compared to what they used to be able to.  Our particle board minds are fragile, are cracking with life experiences.  Our particle board minds are basically pushed together powder attempting to uphold the heavy metal of life’s hardships.  Our particle board minds aren’t as strong as they once were because we have forgotten how to use them, because we have forgotten just how strong they can be, because we have not kept them up to snuff by working them out.  Our particle board minds collapse so easily under the weight of life’s hardships.

At 27, jumping up and slapping doorways with two hands when I walk through isn’t as fun as when I was a kid, but I am going to start doing it again.  Now that I can do it whenever I want, it doesn’t seem as cool, but I have to remember what it was like to dream like that, to have that sort of view on things.

Now, people live longer but live less.

Nietzsche should have just went for that menage a trois.

I hiked Mount Greylock barefoot yesterday.  An hour and six minutes to the top.  I wore only sweatpants that were rolled up into shorts.  No shirt, no shoes, no socks, left my bag behind a third of the way up.  Took my sister April’s dog, Jeter with me.   Hair was down.  Probably the freest I have ever been, since childhood.  I was walking along, and I just stopped.  I yelled.  It felt great.  Just yelled out, I had to, I just had this great feeling.  Was surrounded by nature, but the trees, by a lot of life.  Called my dad, a friend called, called another friend, talked to April all on the way up. Walking along in the woods stripped of mostly everything, back to the very nature, back to the very basics of what it means to be human.  It felt so good.  I ate an apple and when I was done, I threw it.  It wasn’t trash.  Wherever it landed was fine.  It felt right.

We run through life, most likely to look back and say, “Where did all the time go?”  You were looking far too much towards to the future to ever appreciate where you were at the time.

Looking to become a one man revolution.

Whatever you do, don’t sit on my apple.

“I see” said the blind man.  “I hear what you are saying” replied the deaf man.  “Shut the fuck up” screamed the one with no sensory problems.

On the radio they had an advert with Flo-Rida saying, “What’s up this yo boi Flo-Rida.”  No.  We aren’t boys.  I don’t even like you.  Your music sucks, but thank you anyway.

A sitcom:  Typical fat American slobs.
This could involve a television show with fat American slobs sitting around watching TV commenting on what they are watching (perhaps other fat American slobs? - I am not sure how far we can go with this, but it might work).

Straight edge are just Mormons who think they are cooler.  You aint.  Aint nobody cooler than a Mormon.

Concrete = death.  Grass = life.

Keep It Mormon!